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July 24, 2017
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About The Author
Travis J I Corcoran
48 Comments
Morlock Publishing
Uplifted Dogs, AI, anti-gravity, libertarian rebels, and big guns. #ancap #libertarian #sf #scifi
MLP writes: Sgt Morioka got killed w wrench change 52, yet appears later
“Leroy interrupted. Any why not?”
ca 7% in
Leroy on phone with father asking for capital
== The Team ==
“Sargent John Hayes” -> “Sergeant John Hayes”
“Oh, come on LT.” I think there’s a missing line of dialogue from the lieutenant right before this.
“CalTech” is typically written “Caltech” and is far from Palo Alto. Perhaps Stanford was intended?
“smashed it’s battering ram” -> “its”
“even if they got” rest of sentence is missing
== Powers of the Earth ==
Ch 3: “Berkley” -> “Berkeley”
Ch 6: “Alan nodded” -> “Allan” and similarly in 5 or 6 other places
Ch 9: When the long chapter subheading wraps on my reader (iBooks for MacOS and iOS) the first few characters on the wrapped portion are not visible.
Ch. 10: “Make shook his head” -> “Mike”
Ch. 23: “Max met John’s gave” -> “gaze”
Ch. 37: “another voting block” -> “voting bloc”
Ch. 50: “respond to the inevitable attack .” has a space before the period.
Ch. 55: “Wdookkiee” -> “Wookkiee”
Ch. 61 “This is a war.” needs a close quote
Ch. 66: “A principal?” -> “principle”
Ch. 67: “Next think you know” -> “thing”
Ch. 73: “working it’s way” -> “its”
Ch. 75: “were cut they too thin” -> “were they cut”
Ch. 77: “he was’t” -> “wasn’t”
Ch. 81: “watched young five Mexican” -> “watched five young”
Not necessarily bugs:
Ch 8: “mirroring his own earlier scan” seems to refer to Restivo’s earlier scan, not Dewitt’s.
Ch 52: Three consecutive paragraphs start with “Larry [verb]ed”
Ch. 67: “Las Ang-“ -> “Los” perhaps, assuming the reference was to Los Angeles?
Tim Oren writes:
Report spam
Power of the Earth errata:
Location : Edit
514 I cam make it -> I can make it
1430 added another another feature -> added another feature
5325 doctor’s note that says say -> doctor’s note that says
6436 her sparing partner -> her sparring partner
8823 AG breaking is at -> AG braking is at
9654: bottom of the earth moving -> bottom of the earthmover
== Powers of the Earth ==
Dramatis Personae: “President Themba Johson” -> “Johnson”
Ch 66: “Konstantinov Crater, Lunar Nearside” -> “Farside” and similarly in Ch 74, 84, 89, 94, 95, 98, 102, 105, 107, 109, 110, 112, 114, and Ch 192 of “Causes of Separation”
Ch 84: “Icarcus Crater” -> “Icarus” and similarly in Ch 89, 92.
Ch 93: “having beers with captains in the Mark Soldner’s and Rob Wehrmann’s units” -> delete ‘the’
Ch 94: The audio replay from Ch 41 has slight differences in text and has what appears to be extraneous spaces added. The version in Ch 41 seems more polished.
Ch 95: “Jon” -> “John”
Ch 97: “relays rovers” -> “relay rovers”
Ch 97: “a peak over the boulder” -> “peek”
Ch 97: “still floating a above” -> “still floating above”
Ch 97: “pick off them off” -> “pick them off”
Ch 102: “Blue target him with the com laser” -> “targeted”
Ch 102: “Blue looked at Duncan to Max” -> “Duncan and Max”?
Ch 102: “his last action bad been” -> “had”
Not necessarily a bug:
Ch 98: “fubared” used twice within 3 paragraphs
Causes of Separation errata (location approximate, always before edit)
Location : Edit
1509, 2990 Melaine -> Melanie? (consistency)
1932 others, like, you -> others, like you,
2018 Airlock -> Aristillus
3949 an ‘Burning Man art car’ -> a ‘Burning Man art car’
4127 it is you you who -> it is you who
4236 before desert was served -> before dessert was served
4658 changed two two meters -> changed to two meters
5463 you like like hell -> you look like hell
5570 blame this one me -> blame this on me
6403 a dayoh, ago. -> a day ago.
7044 in the surrounding the tunnels -> in the surrounding tunnels
7174 That tactic that had worked -> That tactic had worked
9442 rescued nearly a million (continuity, inconsistent with other counts)
9506 andwalked -> and walked
9679 T is what-> That is what
== Powers of the Earth ==
Ch 110: “view of the chainguns”. “chain gun” and “chaingun” are both used in the text. Suggest using one or the other. Also 1 instance in “Causes of Separation”
Ch 110: “melting and runing” -> “running”
Ch 110: “which had in turn had” -> “which had in turn”
Ch 110: “seen front the ground” -> “seen from the ground”
Ch 110:“keeping the disconnect box keeping” -> “keeping the disconnect box”
Ch 110:“honestly going to that” -> “honestly going to say that”
Ch 110: “It’s not even ‘kill.’ It’s ‘destroy’.” One has period inside quote, the other outside.
Ch 112: “more than enough to than enough to” -> “more than enough to”
Ch 114: “junctions reenforced” -> “junctions reinforced”
Ch 114: “got to Aristillus in half an hour there’d be more work…” The previous sentence says they had nothing to do for more than an hour.
Ch 115: “duffel bas” -> “duffel bags”
Ch 117: “cylindrical packed of bearing clusters” -> Not sure if ‘of’ belongs in there or should be removed.
Ch 117: “power lines would sheer” -> “power lines would shear”
Ch 121: “500 new jobs in her district” -> perhaps “her state” or “Maryland”?
Not necessarily a bug:
Ch 110: “for a solid meter.” The word “solid” is used to describe lengths 2x in this one sentence
Ch 115: “public key/ private key” has a space after the slash but not before.
Ch 121: “super- high-definition” Potentially extra space after the first hyphen
Globular Balloon writes:
Should be “Kevin struggled not to lose his cool”, no?
“Tudel actuall sounded a bit scared when he asked, “How are you going to do that?”
missing a ‘y’ in ‘actually’
Powers of the Earth Ch 1: “propped up on small mountain” -> “propped up on a small mountain”
Beginning of chapter 33, “had hadn’t”
Ch. 55: “No, it would be stupid to do run for it. The safe thing would be to surrender.”
strike “do”
Ch. 55
“We don’t have any troops,” Mike bluffed. “All the Wdookkiee hijackers died when we blew the airlock.”
== Causes of Separation ==
Ch 4: “gray lunar plane” -> I think “plain” may have been intended.
Ch 4: “theairlolk” -> “the airlock”
Ch 4: “lock 912” -> usage elsewhere is “lock #912”
Ch 5: “getting to their feat” -> “getting to their feet”
== Causes of Separation ==
Ch 4: “theairlock” -> “the airlock” (my previous reply had “theairlock” autocorrected to “theairlolk”)
Ch 10: “!Mierda!” -> “¡Mierda!” (inverted exclamation mark) was probably meant
Ch 12: “They convoy was heading” -> “The convoy was heading”
“Setting” of Chapter 54 (bold text at beginning of chapter)
wookkiee should be capitalized
== The Team ==
“tells me that that Mike has” -> “tells me that Mike has”
“asked me to to do” -> “asked me to do”
“got fins one one end.” -> “got fins on one end.”
== Powers of the Earth ==
Ch 1: “Would she able able to see it” -> “Would she be able to see it”
Ch 3: “and Louisa and and taken her” -> “and Louisa and taken her”
Ch 16: “Mike looked looked” -> “Mike looked”
Ch 16: “which made made” -> “which made”
Ch 16 : “he’d been been infatuated” -> “he’d been infatuated”
Ch 18: “one of his his direct reports” -> “one of his direct reports” (note: one ‘his’ in italics)
Ch 20: “felt the the sword” -> “felt the sword”
Ch 23: “we’re the the ones” -> “we’re the ones”
Ch 28: “told them them” -> “told them”
Ch 30: “It turns out that that” -> “It turns out that”
Ch 33: “she was was named” -> “she was named”
Ch 37: “I bet they they had” -> “I bet they had”
Ch 37: “Why did you you move” -> “Why did you you move”
Ch 42: “here there there was no gravity” -> “here there was no gravity”
Ch 43: “low over over the northern horizon” -> “low over the northern horizon”
Ch 44: “look at the the timer” -> “look at the timer”
Ch 46: “tunnel on this this side” -> “tunnel on this side”
Ch 49: “shock wave of of extruded” -> “shock wave of extruded”
Ch 49: “Darcy into into her chair” -> “Darcy into her chair”
Ch 50: “members of the the first team” -> “members of the first team”
Ch 55: “it it was hard to speak” -> “it was hard to speak”
Ch 55: “saw that the the PKs” -> “saw that the PKs”
Ch 55: “ran toward the the PKs.” -> “ran toward the PKs.”
Ch 57: “the the Earth governments” -> “the Earth governments”
Ch 60: “looked at his his drink” -> “looked at his drink”
Ch 67: “scrubbing toilets that that” -> “scrubbing toilets than that”
Ch 67: “She thought that that” -> “She thought that”
Ch 71: “It looked like like” -> “It looked like”
Ch 71: “The casino said said” -> “The casino said”
Ch 73: “but that that shouldn’t be a problem.” -> “but that shouldn’t be a problem.”
Ch 74: “front page at at” -> “front page at”
Ch 74: “How did you you update” -> “How did you update”
Ch 74: “search more more inspiration” -> “search for more inspiration”?
Ch 77: “there was the the icon” -> “there was the icon”
Ch 77: “laws and and violating” -> “laws and violating”
Ch 80: “two months ago the the NSA” -> “two months ago the NSA”
Ch 81: “wasn’t going going to get violent” -> “wasn’t going to get violent”
Ch 83: “Hugh and and his” -> “Hugh and his”
Ch 89: “by the the government’s” -> “by the government’s”
Ch 89: “drop it on on the BuSuR” -> “drop it on the BuSuR”
Ch 95: “climb the gravel, and and” -> “climb the gravel, and”
Ch 97: “mules further back back” -> “mules further back”
Ch 98: “How many many expats” -> “How many expats”
Ch 98: “galloping down the the slope” -> “galloping down the slope”
Ch 110: “Blue looked at at John” -> “Blue looked at John”
Ch 114: “with his his own suggestion” -> “with his own suggestion”
== Causes of Separation ==
Ch 4: “didn’t mean that that fighting” -> “didn’t mean that fighting”
Ch 12: “lost someone in the the” -> “lost someone in the”
Ch 20: “she could be the the” -> “she could be the”
Ch 32: “you admit that that there are” -> “you admit that there are”
Ch 43: “putting this next task off off” -> “putting this next task off”
Ch 49: “Hugh knew felt the the blood drain” -> “Hugh felt the blood drain” (2 deletions)
Ch 50: “Selena had had learned” -> “Selena had learned”
Ch 51: “out of of the kill” -> “out of the kill”
Ch 53: “queuing up for the the” -> “queuing up for the”
Ch 58: “A century ago ago” -> “A century ago”
Ch 60: “But it it looks like” -> “But it looks like”
Ch 64: “it is you you” -> “it is you”
Ch 75: “the navigation screen screen” -> “the navigation screen”
Ch 78: “this was the the best” -> “this was the best”
Ch 80: “and and is only done” -> “and is only done”
Ch 83: “across the the lunar” -> “across the lunar”
Ch 84: “not not gonna fall” -> “not gonna fall”
Ch 89: “you like like hell” -> “you look like hell”
Ch 91: “for another another” -> “for another”
Ch 92: “paced around around” -> “paced around”
Ch 92: “we’ll have have something” -> “we’ll have something”
Ch 95: “going to to mold” -> “going to mold”
Ch 103: “almost all of it it” -> “almost all of it”
Ch 103: “email that had had been” -> “email that had been”
Ch 107: “move the the glass” -> “move the glass”
Ch 107: “talking about about” -> “talking about”
Ch 110: “infantry in in” -> “infantry in”
Ch 113: “There was was less” -> “There was less”
Ch 123: “into the the front” -> “into the front”
Ch 126: “hair, and and dragged” -> “hair, and dragged”
Ch 132: “log in in and” -> “log in and”
Ch 133: “adjusting the the windage” -> “adjusting the windage”
Ch 133: “gotten around around” -> “gotten around”
Ch 143: “say that that I” -> “say that I”
Ch 157: “track down down” -> “track down”
Ch 158: “and and bent forward” -> “and bent forward”
Ch 160: “in a a cloud” -> “in a cloud”
Ch 169: “the the colony” -> “the colony”
Ch 176: “and and the magma” -> “and the magma”
Ch 178: “for for making” -> “for making”
Ch 180: “the the tons” -> “the tons”
Ch 180: “that that Gamma” -> “that Gamma”
Ch 183: “the the flood” -> “the flood”
Ch 185: “bands around around” -> “bands around”
Ch 189: “savoring the the” -> “savoring the”
Ch 191: “a lot of of us” -> “a lot of us”
Ch 192: “the the genesis” -> “the genesis”
== Causes of Separation ==
Ch 12: “Just take the third left” Later description makes it seem like this should be “first left” or “next left”
Ch 12: “oncoming traffic skidded to a half” -> “oncoming traffic skidded to a halt”
== Causes of Separation ==
Dramatis Personae: “Rob Wehramnn” -> “Rob Wehrmann”
Dramatis Personae: “Kathrine Dycus – CEO, Airtight Suits” listed twice
Ch 13: “the trucks’ motor whined.” -> “the truck’s motor whined.”
Ch 16: “RMR Highway level five”: “five” formatted differently than in other chapters. Also “Campus of Saint Joseph of Cupertino, level three” with “three”
Ch 20: “What the if” -> “What if the”
Ch 21: “Leroy waived it away” -> “Leroy waved it away”
Ch 25: “He searched found a switch” -> “He found a switch”? or “searched and found”?
Ch 27: “Job and Melanie” -> “Jacob and Melanie”
Ch 28: “Mr Hollins” -> “Mr. Hollins” (3 places)
Ch 28: “not just your firm but you life” -> “not just your firm but your life”
Ch 29: “Mike waived her away.” -> “Mike waved her away.”
Ch 32: “Over the last week that the CEOs” -> “Over the last week that the CEOs”
Ch 51: “Abroo’s paw” -> “Aabroo’s paw”
Ch: 51: “seen Abroo” -> “seen Aabroo”
Not necessarily a bug:
Ch 31: “care what a bunch of rebels on the moon?’” perhaps “care about” or sentence trails off with “…”?
Chapter 8, POTE: “I’m saying that we I need real troops” -> “I’m saying that I need real troops”
Chapter 17 “Rex was also been the one” -> “Rex had also been the one”
Chapter 17: “John titled his head back” -> “John tilted his head back”
Chapter 17: “we don’t even know if we there are any air scrubbers” – “we don’t even know if there are any air scrubbers”
[Also, and this isn’t really a typo, but in that section there is some serious head-jumping going on that is distracting… At one point, we seem to be in Blue’s head “Blue had no idea if this was the first time…”, and then we’re in John’s “John thought for a moment”, and then back to Blue… I guess it’s supposed to be Blue’s perspective, but I’d probably change the “John thought for a moment” to make that more clear. And then “John was patient – more patient than Blue would be”. Very subtle I admit.]
More “bug” than “typo”
After converting to mobi in the recommended software, black background (for nighttime reading) does not work. I assume this is conversion software issue.
One more reason to get it officially published, so kindle readers can enjoy “natively!”
@ENDERthe3RD notes that printing on spine of hardcovers UNDER dust jacket is wrong
Chapter 11 first paragraph references a quesadilla. 7th paragraph references a burrito. Burrito != quesadilla.
(Will pass over the ones that others caught so far, but apologies if I repeat any)
Team:
* right at the beginning, roughly loc 49 on kindle — “He turned back to John” should be “He turned back to DOUG”.
* right after that, “Sargent” should be “Sergeant”
* Paragraph beginning with “by the time the sound” should have a comma after “later”
For continuity (to avoid retconning and to slim the char cast), would it make sense to replace Samuel with Matt Dewitt?
* roughly loc 187 on kindle, “post docs” should either be one word or hyphenated. (It’s hyphenated later on in at least 2 instances)
* Duncan’s role/tone/demeanor seems much more like that of Rex (especially given that they’re puppies at this point, and should be even more childlike), given a re-read in view of Causes. Similarly, “Cody” might be a better fit for Duncan, and then these interactions with John at least give a basis for why the 4 specific dogs who are traveling with John in Causes are doing so — they’ve had specific interactions with him before.
* Again, for continuity, shouldn’t we see the referred-to “Nick” somewhere in Causes or Powers (he may be in Powers, but I’m not yet through it)
* roughly loc 246 “John turned to Nick” should be “John turned to JULIO”
* roughly loc 336 “terrazzo floor” seems odd/jarring/off-tone.
* roughly loc 366, “With a crash” isn’t but should be followed by a comma
* roughly loc 336, “smashed it’s battering ram” should be “smashed ITS battering ram”
* roughly loc 373 “assaulting further into the complex” seems awkward/odd grammar
* roughly loc 373 “forced himself to breath” should be “forced himself to breathE”
* “dog[s]/Dog[s]” capitalized inconsistently between this and Causes/Powers
* Doug/Dog is a bit close, spelling-wise, maybe consider renaming the character (as he doesn’t reappear) just to make the clarity a bit better
* roughly loc 388 “That’s gamma” should be capital-G “Gamma”.
* roughly loc 409, after “blood spilling from his mouth” there’s a sentence fragment (“Next to him”) that shouldn’t be there, looks like it was repeated accidentally.
* roughly loc 416 — “an orange flash” — Max is described as red, not orange; by contrast, Blue is described as having some orange markings.
* roughly loc 423, sentence beginning “He was dead where he stood,” given the previous 2 sentences has “his” referring to John, consider replacing that first “He” with “The cop” or “The HomeSec Cop” for clarity for the subsequent pronouns to refer back to. Similar issues (but not as severe) with subsequent paragraph and pronouns referring to both John and the shot cops.
* roughly loc 444 “emplace” seems a bit awkward, instead of “place”.
* roughly loc 451 “John slammed one door, shut, then the other” — first comma should be removed.
* roughly loc 459 “then the crumpled fell off the hood of the truck” — noun missing after “crumpled”
* roughly loc 467 “gun fire” should be one word
* roughly loc 473 “seat-belt” should be one word or two words, not hyphenated (least common).
* roughly loc 473 “and then, they were on the highway” — delete comma
* roughly loc 502 “an crackling explosion” should be “A crackling explosion”
* roughly loc 502 “the world went dark” should be “The world went dark” (capitalization) to be consistent with the subsequent sentences.
* roughly loc 510 “window sill” should be one word.
Causes:
Chapter 21 — “Bosphoros” should be “BosphorUs” or “Bosporus” depending on the transliteration.
Chapter 54, header (and some others) — capitalization — “bridge of AFS The wookkiee” should have the B and W capitalized, consider making the “T” lowercase.
Chapter 67 — “Las Ang-” Mark snorted. Should be “LOs Ang-”
Chapter 71 — “armorered. And cut a check” — should be “armorED”.
Chapter 74 — “engineering Dogs” should be “engineerED Dogs”.
“Icarcus” in multiple chapter headings already caught.
Chapter 84 — “your second cousin is destined to the throne” — awkward phrasing. Seems like a verb is missing between “to” and “the”.
Chapter 92 — “and Rex. They remembered.” That “Rex” should be “Max”.
Chapter 98 — “bolder, and saw a man on all fours.” That “bolder” should be “boUlder”.
Chapter 102. — “Rex was dead. His friend. His pack-mate. **His younger brother.**” — “younger brother” is not consistent unless it’s speaking purely metaphorically, as Rex is G2 and Max/Blue are G1, and this is not from Duncan’s POV. I’d suggest replacing it with “nephew”.
Chapter 111 — “REMF mother fuckers!” is literally redundant, but perhaps that’s intentional.
Bit in Chapter 121 referring to Haig’s “district” should have already been caught — she’s a Senatrix, not a rep.
Doing this from memory, but at about the 30% mark, when the government is in conflict with the moonfolk and have a confrontation over the AG ships, and shoot them every 30 seconds, it is described that the remaining crew take their one dead comrade with them, but two comrades were actually shot.
== Causes of Separation ==
Ch 32: “Over the last week that the CEOs” -> “Over the last week the CEOs” (mentioned in my previous comment but with no correction)
Ch 34: “concilliatory” -> “conciliatory”
Ch 35: “Board Room Group” -> “Boardroom Group”
Ch 36: “we’ll never enough people” -> “we’ll never have enough people”
Ch 38: video playback starting with “Louisa’s voice:” is larger than other text.
Ch 43: “he could keep the believe that” -> “he could keep the belief that”
Ch 44: “Alan” -> “Allan”
Ch 47: “Carrie Ann” -> “Carrie-Ann” 2 places.
== Causes of Separation ==
Hardcover inside flap: “they need slap down the lunar expats” -> “they need to slap down the lunar expats”
Printed novel: Limited Edition Hardcover section has printing flaw. (Does not affect Powers)
Printed novel: Front matter should have blank page xiv added so Ch 1 starts on p. 1
Ch 50: “from everyone in her district” -> “from everyone in her state”
Ch 51: “He’s seen the pop-science” -> “He’d seen the pop-science”
Ch 53: “he’d always been pushed himself” -> “he’d always pushed himself”
Ch 54: “bonafides” -> “bona fides” seems more common although you’re the man with the OED.
Ch 54: “in gravel boat number were not” -> “in gravel boat number one were not”?
Ch 54: “the drive breaking the ship to a crawl” -> “the drive braking the ship to a crawl”
Ch 54: “atmosphere was here was” -> “atmosphere here was”
Ch 54, 56, 58: character name alternates between Lummus and Lumus.
Ch 57: “punishing in confined stairwell” -> “punishing in the confined stairwell”
Ch 58: “into an wall” -> “into a wall”
Ch 58: He checked column” -> “He checked the column”
Ch 58: “wasn’t stop” -> “wasn’t stopping”
Ch 58: “left most” -> “leftmost”
Ch 60: “pulled the chains taught” -> “pulled the chains taut”
Ch 60: “stared the wallscreen” -> “stared at the wallscreen”
Ch 60: “Pem nodded” -> “Prem nodded”
Ch 60: “Yes, it is the scary” -> “Yes, it is scary” (could be error by character)
Ch 60: “too late too worry now” -> “too late to worry now”
Ch 61: “part way” perhaps “partway” is more common?
Ch 63: “discomforted” perhaps “discomfited” fits better? See also Ch 37 of Powers
== Causes of Separation ==
Hardcover inside flap: describes Powers of the Earth in two places rather than Causes of Separation
Ch 66: “Sheila, a blond” -> “Sheila, a blonde” similar in Ch 88
Ch 66: “before desert was served” -> “before dessert was served”
Ch 69: “The usual propaganda rags a variety of videos” seems to be missing a verb after “rags”
Ch 69: “involuntarilly” -> “involuntarily”
Ch 70: “outside the Situation room” -> “outside the Situation Room” (upper case)
Ch 70: “He’s seen people charged” -> “He’d seen people charged”
Ch 80: “the Aristillus Ideology’ or ‘the Aristillus disease” -> Ideology capitalized but disease isn’t.
Ch 80: “We are told that these enhanced interrogations are done only in ‘ticking time bomb’ scenarios, with warrants, with doctors” -> This fragment repeats what was said a paragraph earlier
Ch 80: “nor not a laser attack” -> “nor a laser attack”
Ch 85: “her pony tail” -> “her ponytail”
Not necessarily a bug:
Ch 46: The Prem Pradeep character in Ch 46, 60, etc. is interleaved with the Prem Rohit character in Ch 58, 67. Might be easier to follow if one or the other were renamed.
Ch 72: this is the first mention of PK meaning Peace Keeper. Perhaps consider mentioning it somewhere in Powers?
Ch 81: “The list had never been full, even once before.” Perhaps “not even once before.”?
Causes — Ch. 26 — DC Minute Anchors are “Jacob and MelaINe” and then later on in the paragraph they are “Job and MelaNIe”.
Causes — Ch. 27 “Darren rolled those words over. ‘What do you mean, “full control”?'”
The quotation doesn’t work there. What he’s quoting from was “a full amnesty and continued control.”
Causes, Ch. 35 “People are guessing it’s the Board Room Group, though.” –> “Boardroom”, one word.
== Powers of the Earth ==
Ch 6: unlike every other chapter subheading n this book, this don’t mention “2064:”
Ch 45: unlike every other chapter in this book, this doesn’t contain a chapter subheading
Ch 71, 81: “2064” -> “2064:”
Ch 82: “2063,” -> “2064:”
== Causes of Separation ==
Ch 5: unlike every other chapter I’ve read so far in this book, this doesn’t contain a chapter subheading
Ch 84: “Why the hell was taking so long” -> “Why the hell was it taking so long”
Ch 90: “rubbed the grit of out his eyes” -> “rubbed the grit out of his eyes”
Ch 92: “to a schedule for the software schedule” -> “to a schedule for the software”
Ch 92: “There’s going to have a battle here” -> “There’s going to be a battle here”
Ch 95: “and 02 levels” -> change numerals “02” to letter O subscript 2
Ch 95: “ships out the sky” -> “ships out of the sky”
Ch 96: “He could heard Bishop Flynn” -> “He could hear Bishop Flynn”
Ch 100, 102: “2064: Nevada, US, Earth” other chapter subheadings are of the form “State, Earth”.
Might not be a bug
Ch 85: “dangling, annoying,” -> “dangling, annoyingly”?
Ch 98: game units called were-creatures, then were-beasts, then werebears. Could certainly be intentional.
Causes (again, I wasn’t doing a close read, this is just what jumped out at me):
Ch. 46: “I would never trust the lives of MY OUR children to a vehicle”
Ch. 48: “eight to ninety percent drop in shipping volume.” –> eighTY
Ch. 49 — her name is back to “MelaINe” instead of “MelaNIe”
Ch. 49 — “caffeinated, carbonated lime soda” — isn’t “carbonated . . . soda” redundant?
Ch. 54 — “the embedded systems in gravel boat number were not programmed” –> gravel boat number ONE
Ch. 58 — “from the building wasn’t stop.” –> “wasn’t stoppING”
Ch. 59 — “immediately a Nigerian men in jeans and a polo shirt slapped Louisa.” –> “a Nigerian MAN”
Ch. 61 — “just a petit bourgeoisie version of the police state” — spelling-wise, it should be “petitE bourgeoisie” but bourgeoisie is a noun, so grammatically it should be “petit bourgeois”. Also, French is a stupid fucking language for stupid people.
Ch. 72 — “Ashoke hoped . . . ” –> “ASHOK hoped”
Ch. 84 — “three minutes out. Breath. Three minutes was more than enough time . . .” — I think “Breath” should be “Breathe” here, just the noun sounds odd and jarring.
Ch. 92 — “indicating all or Aristillus” –> “indicating all OF Aristillus”
Ch. 112 — “reached the jersey barriers in seconds.” — Capital-J “Jersey” to be consistent with how you use it in The Team and later in this chapter (or make them all lower case, but don’t vary it)
Ch. 118 — “the rovers weren’t following hismen” –> “weren’t following HIS MEN”
Ch. 119 — towards the end, he’s referred to as “Reimmer” twice instead of “Reimmers”
Ch. 148 — “sign saying ‘Rebeca’s favorites'” –> “RebeCCa’s Favorites”
Ch. 155, final sentence is just “How much worse can it?” — you need a verb (i.e., “GET”)
Chs. 156, 165 — chapter headers, “feedlot” is the first non-numerical word, should be capitalized to Feedlot
Ch. 165 — “Lemons followed the major and his scouts” –> “LeMMons”
Chapter 176 — your paleontology timeline is WAY off. “Animals evolved. Life reached a height, of sorts, as ninety- ton brachiosauruses walked across land that would later be North America and Africa. . . . Thus was the crater Aristillus born, ***1.3 billion years before humanity came into existence*** . . . “a billion years passed, dinosaurs died off and mammals rose.” No. Just no. Brachiosaurus lives in the late Jurassic, about 154 MYA, so you’re off by an order of magnitude in implying that brachiosaurii were walking around when the crater was made. Even after that billion years passed, brachiosaurus 300 MYA, brachiosaurus still wasn’t going to appear for another 150 MYA or or so — about as long as it’s now been extinct.
By contrast, 1.3 BYA was the Ectasian period of the mesoproterozoic era. We didn’t have dinosaurs, but we had just gotten multi-cellular organisms who had just figured out sexual reproduction in the form of some red algae. — https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ectasian
— Also, should be no space between “ninety-” and “ton”
Ch. 185 – “Yes. It’s barbaric. *T* is what I was looking for.” –> “T” should be “That”
— Father Alex shrugged, as if to say, “the words are coming” –> capitalization “**The** words are coming”
Ch. 192 (afterword)
— “it’s a parallel a line” — non-grammatical, preposition missing
— “consciously fashioned John and the **Dog’s** adventures” –> ” Dogs’ ”
— When using middle initials, you are inconsistent as to whether there is a period (e.g., Eric S Raymond, James C Scott’s, Timothy C May); contra “Albert O. Hirschman”
You really need to seek out a partial refund of those 2 different copy-editing fees you paid, my friend.
== Powers of the Earth ==
Ch 81: “take an side tunnel exit.” -> “take a side tunnel exit.”
Ch 121: “We we will not be the first” -> “We will not be the first”
Ch 121: “At an temporary impasse” -> “At a temporary impasse”
== Causes of Separation ==
Ch 27: “found an chair” -> “found a chair”
Ch 47: “an collective intake of breath” -> “a collective intake of breath”
Ch 51/135: “reenforced” -> “reinforced”
Ch 105: “From the Sun Tzu” -> “From Sun Tzu” ?
Ch 107: “When when” -> “When”
Ch 115: “The warnings of from her helmet” -> “The warnings from her helmet”
Ch 118: “when one the massive” -> “when one of the massive”
Ch 119: “that had lead to this call” -> “that had led to this call”
Ch 121: “feed lot #22” -> “feedlot #22” to match chapter subheading
Ch 133: “would tell us if there peakers in this area.” -> “would tell us if there were peakers in this area.”
Ch 134/137: “level ???” Was this intended to be ambiguous?
Ch 134: “one of his boots would free of the roadbed” -> “one of his boots would come free of the roadbed”? Not sure what word was intended.
Ch 142: “They’d even followed him even here” -> “They’d even followed him here”
Ch 152: “Reimmer nodded” -> “Reimmers nodded” (Lowell noted similar in another chapter)
Ch 155: “At you word, sir.” -> “At your word, sir.”?
Ch 157: “up …and the surface” Inconsistent spacing around ellipses. This instance has space before. Other places use space after. Still others have no spaces.
Ch 161: “Chapter 161” In this and many other chapters the markup seems incorrect. On two readers, the final ‘1’ looks different than the initial ‘1’ .
Ch 165: “TBM breaching bridge” -> Ch 155 mentions “TBM broaching bridge”. The next sentence mentions “broaching tunnel” and I wasn’t able to visualize what that referred to.
Ch 167: “number 6” -> Ch 108 says Raptor #3 crashed
Ch 170: “an skull-piercing shriek” -> “a skull-piercing shriek”
Ch 173: “rightnow” -> “right now”
Ch 180: “We’ve go enough here to all we need for decades” -> “We’ve got enough here for decades”
Ch 185: “he stumbled, the recovered” -> “he stumbled, then recovered”
Ch 186-187: “2066:” -> I don’t think the year makes sense given the stated distances. Unless the distances are wrong. But then “new president” seems more appropriate for 2065?
Ch 189: “the sun peeking out over white of the snowcaps” -> “the sun peeking out over the white of the snowcaps”?
Afterward: “first encountered in when reading about” -> “first encountered when reading about”
Afterward: “April 19th, 1776” not sure of this reference. Did you mean 1775?
Afterward: “Wookie” spelled differently. Also the Star Wars character spelled “Wookiee” and not “Wookkiee” as in these stories.
Might not be a bug
Ch 107: “What your type don’t understand” -> “doesn’t” seems better but I’m not sure.
Ch 115: “designed to be coupled tight” -> “designed to be coupled tightly”?
Ch 166: “were torn loose and were thrown across” perhaps delete the second “were”?
Throughout the two novels and The Team, characters lick, purse, or pinch their lips at least 75 times.
The precise title of the first novel seems to be “The Powers of the Earth” but the cover and certain other places say “Powers of the Earth”. I am not sure if this is typical.
The similar terms “jury-rigged” and “jerry-rigged” each appear in the novels. I’m not sure if there’s a distinction intended, but if not perhaps consider standardizing on one or the other.
== Powers of the Earth ==
Dramatis Personae: “Kathrine Dycus – CEO, Airtight Suits” -> “Katherine Dycus – CEO, Airtight Suits”
Dramatis Personae: Katherine Dycus listed twice (previously mentioned this error for “Causes of Separation”)
Ch 2: “California Earthquake Relief” -> maybe “California earthquake relief bill” and similar lower case in next paragraph?
Ch 10: “talk about how the registries works” -> “talk about how the registry works” or “talk about how registries work”?
Ch 12: “Lina gave him a disappointed look” -> “Linda gave him a disappointed look”
Ch 26: “The overhead disneys and atmospherics” -> “displays”?
Ch 121: “natural disasters like the California Earthquake” -> “natural disasters like the California earthquake” (unless upper case was intentional)
== Causes of Separation ==
Dramatis Personae: “Kathrine Dycus – CEO, Airtight Suits” -> “Katherine Dycus – CEO, Airtight Suits”
Ch 20/24/95: “Kathrine Dycus” -> “Katherine Dycus”
== Powers of the Earth ==
Ch 112: “anchor lines snapped taught” -> “anchor lines snapped taut”
== Causes of Separation ==
Ch 6: “his suit stiffened and grew taught” -> “his suit stiffened and grew taut”
Ch 8: “this time Connors was looking” -> “this time Conner was looking”
Ch 8: “Connor blinked in shock” -> “Conner blinked in shock”
Ch 8: “Major Connor grinned stupidly” -> “Major Conner grinned stupidly”
Ch 8: “Major Connor looked down” -> “Major Conner looked down”
Ch 12: “He’d know they were incompetent” -> “He’d known they were incompetent”
Ch 143: “with loud CRUMPs” -> other usages use “crump(s)” in lower case
Not necessarily a bug
Ch 8: “It wasn’t like he was an early explorer, or anything,” -> remove commas? Usually these books omit commas where other writers might include them.
Ch 12: “turn into a blood bath” -> “bloodbath” is more commonly used
Causes of Seperation
Chapter 58 page 233: the proper procedure to bust open a door is not to ram your shoulder into it like usually depicted on tv but to kick as close to the lock with your foot as possible. eg: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Qu8iHkBHGg
== The Powers of the Earth (Kindle edition, 11/2017) ==
Ch 67: “more people scrubbing toilets that.” -> “more people scrubbing toilets than that.” (Note: was changed from “that that” after Kickstarter edition.)
Ch 74: “Konstantinov Crater, Lunar Nearside” -> “Konstantinov Crater, Lunar Farside”
Ch 89: “Icarcus Crater, Lunar Nearside” -> “Icarus Crater, Lunar Farside” (2 typos)
Ch 92: “Icarcus Crater” -> “Icarus Crater”
Ch 94: “Zhukovskiy Crater, Lunar Nearside” -> “Zhukovskiy Crater, Lunar Farside” also chapters 95, 98, 102, 105, 107, 109, 110, 112, 114
Ch 107: “we don’t walk where the the chain guns can see us.” -> “we don’t walk where the chain guns can see us.”
Benjamin White writes:
*THE POWERS OF EARTH**
*
Chapter 55: Wdookkiee hijackers died when we blew the airlock.
Misspelling: “Wdookkiee” should be “Wookkiee”
Chapter 56: acknowledge his salute and Tudel moved
Bad tense: “acknowledge” should be “acknowledged”
Chapter 61: A list of grievance? Darren interrupted.
Singular/plural disagreement: “grievance” should be “grievances”
Chapter 67: that saved Las Ang-
Misspelling: “Las” should be “Los”
Chapter 84: Icarcus Crater, Lunar Nearside
Misspelling: “Icarcus” should be “Icarus”
Chapter 84: standing in a dripping cancerous forest
Wrong word: “cancerous” should be “coniferous” (surely?)
Chapter 89: Icarcus Crater, Lunar Nearside
Misspelling: “Icarcus” should be “Icarus”
Chapter 89: John, you’re say that
Bad tense: “say” should be “saying”
Chapter 92: Icarcus Crater, Lunar Nearside
Misspelling: “Icarcus” should be “Icarus” (overzealous with the Meta-? word completion?)
Chapter 112: won’t let me us power module one
Wrong word: “us” should be “use”
Chapter 117: cylindrical packed of bearing clusters
Wrong word: “packed” should be “packs” (unsure – “packets”?)
*CAUSES OF SEPARATION**
*
Chapter 32: sneak in a government a government by the back door
Repeated words: “a government”
Chapter 40: even get a callback from our state rep
Wrong word: “callback” should be “call back” (unless the reps are
programs and a callback is a lambda which a constituent can enqueue —
which would be amazing)
Chapter 48: imply an eight to ninety percent drop
Wrong word: “eight” should be “eighty”
Chapter 49: Hugh knew felt the blood drain from his face
Erroneous extra word: “knew”
Chapter 58: as he huge cook sprinted into the courtyard
Wrong word: “he” should be “the”
Chapter 95: CO2 and 02 levels is the total amount
Wrong word: “02” should be “02”
Chapter 95: Did you seen Ponzie
Wrong word: “seen” should be “see”
Chapter 149: Darcy prided himself on never yelling
Wrong word: “himself” should be “herself”
Chapter 155: How much worse can it?
Missing word: “can it get”? “can it be”?
Chapter 158: W’re going to let him go
Misspelled word: “W’re” should be “We’re”
Chapter 176: the water-thin magma
Wrong word: “water-thin” should be “wafer-thin”
Chapter 180: We’ve go enough here
Wrong word: “go” should go “got”
Just figured out how to update the Kindle version of “Powers” and noticed the following.
Kindle store description: “they need slap down the lunar expats” -> “they need to slap down the lunar expats”
Chapter 1
Note – Location 2
Needs page break
Chapter 10
Note – Page 49 · Location 833
“registry works” or “registries work”
Chapter 26
Note – Page 122 · Location 1819
What’s a “disney”? (Previously reported)
Chapter 37
Note – Page 170 · Location 2475
“discomfited”? (Previously mentioned)
Chapter 84
Note – Page 438 · Location 6092
Farside, also in ch 89, 102, 105, 114
Chapter 92
Note – Page 475 · Location 6583
Icarus
MG writes via email:
1) at 32% mark on my Kindle (32 percent through the novel), in either the 46th or 47th chapter, at “location 2490″ on my Kindle (whatever that means), I spotted this:
The tunnel on this this side of the …. was laid out in the…”
2) in 48th chapter, location 2571 on Kindle, at 33 percent through novel, I wrote down something garbled (i.e. I can’t read my own writing), but it’s a sentence that says something like “Albert got used at all age wall screen” – NOT SURE what I spotted that was wrong – but just checked it in the print book of chapter 48, and confirmed it’s a sentence about Albert Lai, but it may be significant that I cannot find the same typo in the print version of chapter 48.
3) in chapter 51, at the start of chapter
“Mike gunned the throttle and raced the surface transporter through the along the paths course by the Wookkiee.”
The problem here: You can write either “through the” or “along the paths” of the Wookkiee – but not both.
4) location 3017 at 39 percent through the Kindle book
“He ignored it and spun the wheel a dozen times nd then pushed against the inner door.
Problem: typo, you meant “and” but it says “nd.”
5) Chapter 55, location 3063, at 39 percent thru Kindle:
Bert j egged the controls and the view swung two miles left, nsthen one meta forward.”
(Again, I can’t quite read everything I wrote down, but there was a problem at the “nsthen” or whatever that was in that sentence.
6) Chapter 57, location 3280, 42 percent through Kindle
“Bert saw the the Earth governments had the AG drive…”
The problem: a duplicate “the the”
(My own problem is I can’t read my scrawled notes, so I am not sure what Bert “saw” or what that word was, but that word was OK.)
7) an example of the lack of italics but the use of /italics/ instead came in chapter 57 at 42percent, location 3280 on kindle:
/Of course/ they’d reverse engineered the…
8) at 42 percent into kindle, at location 3292
And if even if that was ww…? from his ??re??
The problem: if even if
The solution: probably, delete the first if
9) 42nd percent, location 3304 , probably around the 57th chapter
And him and Darcy dead, or in separate underground jail cells for their rest of their lives…
the problem: two theirs, when you need a “the” before rest, not “their.”
10) location 3506, 45 percent thru Kindle
“You’re an introvert who only deals with people as much as you have to to get your projects done.”
Problem: duplicate “to to.” Delete one.
== Powers of the Earth ==
Dramatis Personæ: “Rob Wehramnn” -> “Rob Wehrmann”
Dramatis Personæ: “Leory Fournier” -> “Leroy Fournier”
Dramatis Personæ: “Chiwetal” -> spelled “Chiwetel” in Ch. 16
Ch 2: “Catherine, the DoD liason” -> “Catherine, the DoD liaison”
Ch 12: “He paused to consider it further before rendering judgement.” -> spelled “judgment” in other places in Powers and Causes
Ch 14: “He swivelled in his chair” -> spelled “swiveled” in multiple other places
Ch 15: ““Is this the last of the cajun chicken?” -> ““Is this the last of the Cajun chicken?” (capitalized earlier in this chapter)
Ch 21: “Bosphoros” -> Bosporus or Bosphorus
Ch 24: “It was labelled ‘Pacific Northwest’” -> spelled “labeled” or “unlabeled in other places in Powers and Causes
Ch 25: “Aarsonson smiled, uncrossed his arms” -> “Aaronson” 4x in this Ch 25
Ch 35: “Tudel tisked” -> “Tudel tsked”
Ch 36: “Tudel barked at Wasseem” -> “Waseem” 11 places
Ch 37: “between himself and the craper lip” -> ““between himself and the crater lip”
Ch 37: “Were they intentionally hidden? Camoflauged?” -> “Camouflaged?”
Ch 41: “You’re starting to get worried that the antisingularitarians on Earth” -> perhaps “anti-singulatarian” to match spelling in Ch 66: “stuff of anti-singulatarian nightmares”
Ch 45: “why is the Wookiee now also coming over the northern pole?” -> “Wookkiee” is the spelling throughout
Ch 47: “The Wookiee – with Darcy on board” -> “Wookkiee”
Ch 49: “For a de-orbiting burn?” -> spelled “deorbiting” in 5 other places in Ch 49
Ch 50: “leaned forward, agressively” -> “leaned forward, aggressively”
Ch 50: “flashes of night sky, ocean, and brighly lit ship.” -> “brightly”
Ch 50: “thrown off the ship’s deck by the antigravity drive” -> “anti-gravity” as in multiple other places
Ch. 50: “That leaves twnety-one soldiers unaccounted for.” -> “twenty-one”
Ch 52: “then the bodies of Anwar and Hamid fell against her” -> “Anward”
Ch 54: “clad only in a dark grey camo” -> “gray” in 14 other places
Ch 55: “called Kirk with the auxillary power vehicle” -> “auxiliary”
Ch 65: “He should say something, be more foreceful” -> “forceful”
Ch 71: “Armed and armorered” -> “armored”
Ch 72: “stylus on the table before rendering judgement” -> spelled “judgment” in other places in Powers and Causes
== The Powers of the Earth ==
Ch 1: “Well, I mostly – woah” -> “whoa” seems to be the more common spelling. (4 places total in Powers and Causes)
Ch 48: “Who’s the crew chief? Olusegun…OK, ” -> Olusegeun” also one place in Ch 79
Ch 74: “So, anyway. Bookshare.” -> “BookShare” as in other places
Ch 83: “smarter than the average protestor” -> “protester”
Ch 89: “Mike’s anarchocapitalist craziness” -> “anarchocaptalist” is spelled without a hyphen here, with a hyphen in the author description, and as two words in the Causes Afterword.
Ch 91: “all of the outgoing flights were cancelled” -> “canceled” to match other uses
Ch 94: “computer systems of Aristillus’ satelites” -> “satellites”
Ch 97: “An YM-20 with triggers” -> use “A”?
Ch 98: “what the fuck iss going on over there?” -> “is”
Ch 101: “Chuck Sunderstrand continued his explaination” -> “explanation”
Ch 102: “Duncan snarted to sniffle”-> “started”
Ch 102: “Duncan had reprogramed the mules” -> “reprogrammed”
Ch 112: “John lifted the welding unit, detatched” -> “detached”
Ch 115: “the two men he’d tased and tranked”-> I wonder if “tranqued” is a more standard spelling.
Ch 117: “it all but slipped across the sweeaty skin” -> “sweaty”
== Causes of Separation ==
Dramatis Personæ: “Leory Fournier” -> “Leroy Fournier”
Dramatis Personæ: “daughter of Chiwetal” -> spelled “Chiwetel” in Ch 159
Ch 5: “Mason Dixon’s got the cubic listed as untunnelled” -> spelled “tunneled”/“untunneled” elsewhere in Powers and Causes
Ch 7: “Olusgun felt the panic rising” -> “ Olusegun”
Ch 25: “a bowl of paperclips, and a dirty promotional” -> only other usage of “paper clips” had a space (Ch 20)
Ch 31: “Mike nodded. “Saint Ignatius Loyala.””-> “Loyola”
Ch 32: “why don’t they already have all these ep-doors?” -> other uses are “e-p-doors”
Ch 32: “But the fact is that Morlock, General Tunnels, Deepmine, Selzter” -> spelled “Seltzer” in Powers Ch 7
Ch 32: “Mike surpressed a frown and stood, then extended a hand across the table” -> “suppressed”
Ch 37: “The path took him through Nothern Logistics’ corporate gym” -> “Northern”
Ch 41: “supporting groups we alread know of” -> “already”
Ch 41: “construction debris at eighteen locations and zero EP-doors” -> other uses are “e-p-doors”
Ch 43: “even if the PKs have a mole in a telcom company” -> Perhaps “telecom”?
Ch 43: “And not just her’s” -> “hers” or “her” seems more standard
Ch 58: “Kinding yelled to Mund” -> “Kindig”
Ch 59: “hand slipped off her elbow and – unstrestrained” -> “unrestrained”
Ch 73: “This video came from Viewspace” -> “ViewSpace” to match other usages. 4 places in this chapter
Ch 108: “Decamp looked up from his screen” -> “DeCamp” is used 6 times, “Decamp 8 times. Make consistent
Ch 108: “switched coms in and out of Carson city” -> “Carson City”
Ch 122: “bullet hit the concrete planter a handsbreath away” -> “handsbreadth”
Ch 157: “The rest of Reimmer’s men” -> “Reimmers’s” (other similar cases previously reported)
Ch 157: “struggling to punch through the smokey air” -> “smoky” seems standard
Ch 169: “were caught by the antigravity fields, and were thrown aside” -> “anti-gravity” to match other uses
Ch 178: “Mike grunted noncomittally, talked a bit more” -> “noncommittally”
Afterword: “Random historical footntoes” -> “footnoted”
I see it’s been over a year since anyone posted here. Both of my books were printed in 2020, so I don’t know if these typos have been mentioned above or not. But they have not been corrected.
Book One print-on-demand high quality trade paperback, “Second Edition” 649 pages
I noticed some earlier typos, but didn’t start keeping track of them until p. 230. Almost every single typo will survive a spell-check, except the first one.
p. 230: agressively “President planted her hands on the table and leaned forward, agressively
p. 299 “List of grievances” becomes “List of grievance” in next paragraph.
p. 302 Karina spelled just Karin
p. 307 “it was hard to find out anything about at all about ex-cops…”
p. 342 “Mike turned and looked [at] the masked protesters and noticed their cameras.”
p. 360 At the bottom of the page, they call the Captain “LT” (which is lieutenant).
p. 396 Dewitt tells the men “remember, lift with your backs.” The usual saying is “lift with your legs, not your back.” But maybe the author has some new science in 2064 to support this or lunar gravity changes the desirable way to lift.
p. 409 speaking of gravel trains, “regenerative breaking” should be braking.
p. 465 “they doesn’t have a security provider”
p. 484 satelites ? satellites
p. 530 “Tai, what the fuck iss going on…”
p. 564 bottom of page: opposable thumbs. It used to be aposable thumbs, but now everyone says opposable anyway…
p. 594 “if you won’t let me us one” use one
BOOK TWO “First Edition, May 2018” print on demand high quality trade paperback, 706 pages, printed in 2020.
p. 9 “a man wearing in heltmetless spacesuit” “an helmetless” or “a helmetless.”
p. 89 last line: “the most important thing right [NOW] is framing things back home.”
p. 90 Jacob and Melanie become “Job and Melanie”
p. 107 “Saint Ignatius Loyala” Loyola or “of Loyola”
p. 109 “we Jesuits had missionaries in North American almost two hundred years…” North America.
p. 117 bottom of page; “But they’ll be a hiccup.” there will be or there’ll be
p. 163 “didn’t most of the tunnels had more authentic character than..” had ? have
p. 171 “He sat there for half an hour before he turning the lights back on.” extra he, or before he turned the lights back on.
p. 175 “speak” is double-underlined for no reason.
p. 192 “even if he link was censored…” the link
p. 240, Chapter 58, we meet the escape freighter pilot named Prem Rohit, then in Chapter 60 there is another Prem.
p. 244, John is called “LT” Maybe he is a lieutenant because his actual rank is never mentioned anywhere else, but that seems wrong.
p. 252 bottom line “atthe” at the
p. 304 “the puddle of illumination from the a few overhead work lights…” the a
p. 314 The second Prem suddenly becomes, Pram twice.
p. 317 “He had know Darcy was tired…” known
p. 377 “these people who are trying to immigrate her today…” her ? here
Then I stopped keeping track…
Notes and highlights for
Causes of Separation (Aristillus Book 2)
Corcoran, Travis J. I.
Chapter 45
Highlight (pink) – Page 171 · Location 2868
He sat there for half an hour before he turning the lights back on and moving to his desk .
Chapter 53
Highlight (pink) – Page 211 · Location 3517
After so long he was could hardly believe that he was back on Earth .
Chapter 58
Highlight (pink) – Page 231 · Location 3814
He could heard Mund , at the other end of the line , yelling the same set of instructions .
Highlight (pink) – Page 242 · Location 3998
The first time they’d fallen back through a steel door and hot – epoxied it shut it , it had stopped the PKs for three minutes .
Highlight (pink) – Page 243 · Location 4009
He hoped they busy shooting , and not dead .
Chapter 60
Highlight (pink) – Page 252 · Location 4155
Ashok ignored the twisting feeling in his gut and stared atthe wallscreen .
Chapter 61
Highlight (pink) – Page 257 · Location 4223
He slide the bowl closer , pulled one screw out and started to affix the cover plate .
Chapter 62
Highlight (pink) – Page 260 · Location 4273
Mike tapped at the screen with his stylus , bring up the reports yet again .
Chapter 73
Highlight (pink) – Page 305 · Location 4955
After all she’d been through – was she was ready not just to attend a meeting , but to lead one ?
Chapter 76
Highlight (pink) – Page 317 · Location 5134
He had know Darcy was tired – deeply tired – and stressed .
Chapter 78
Highlight (pink) – Page 322 · Location 5205
What did care if she had a new secondary ?
Chapter 79
Highlight (pink) – Page 329 · Location 5299
” They bastards recorded it .
Chapter 80
Highlight (pink) – Page 332 · Location 5343
– but it encompass a lot of things .
Chapter 84
Highlight (pink) – Page 349 · Location 5603
She stay on her back and looked at him imploringly .
Chapter 88
Highlight (pink) – Page 357 · Location 5721
He’d had been discomfited when he was told , less than a minute after stepping out
Highlight (pink) – Page 358 · Location 5745
Someone was handing out flyers – print flyers on paper ! – for apartments passed by
Chapter 92
Highlight (pink) – Page 367 · Location 5871
” The software is going to take longer that we’d thought
Chapter 95
Highlight (pink) – Page 377 · Location 6001
” These people who are trying to immigrate her today – every one of them , they made a decision .
Highlight (pink) – Page 386 · Location 6143
Out aim is simple .
Highlight (pink) – Page 386 · Location 6144
The held the room’s attention for a long moment .
Chapter 99
Highlight (pink) – Page 402 · Location 6378
Lind read more .
Chapter 105
Highlight (pink) – Page 417 · Location 6587
Major Van Duong stood in the bleachers and watched yet another company of the 30th Red Stripe formed up on the field below .
Chapter 117
Highlight (pink) – Page 460 · Location 7233
The giant black – and – yellow striped e – p – door that the crews had been installed a month back was closed behind her ,
Chapter 123
Highlight (pink) – Page 479 · Location 7482
They ADF couldn’t lose – they just couldn’t .
Chapter 144
Highlight (pink) – Page 540 · Location 8362
She started back at him , confident .
Chapter 149
Highlight (pink) – Page 554 · Location 8541
The hand gripped the phone tightened , and her knuckles turned white .
Chapter 150
Highlight (pink) – Page 556 · Location 8566
Ewoma sat on the couch watching with her new dog Vacuum curled up against her left side .
Chapter 180
Highlight (pink) – Page 647 · Location 9852
Mike hadn’t been expected that answer .
Chapter 191
Highlight (pink) – Page 691 · Location 10496
” We need to find the John and the other survivors of the Nan Garde mission and rescue them .